Janeen Jackson

Perfect Pitch

Dizzy, lightheaded, clammy skin, heartburn, nausea, anxiety, palpitations, and shortness of breath are symptoms of a heart attack, which I thought I was experiencing. However, it was my nerves, and they were getting the best of me. I was about to make the call to Jeannie and hear my birth mother’s voice for the firstContinue reading “Perfect Pitch”

Reparations

“We should not seek a world where the black race and white race live in harmony, but in a world in which the terms black and white have no real political meaning.” – Ta-Naheshi Coates April 19, 2018 Two weeks had passed, and my mind and emotions were still dizzy, hazy about my discovery. IContinue reading “Reparations”

HBCU Graduates

April 17, 2018 Sam sent me an email today with a scanned image of himself. It’s a local news article, and he’s leading children in dance as he plays the harmonica. He’s so incredibly thin. I was skinny too and wore a size 0/2 until I had my second child. I really can’t believe thisContinue reading “HBCU Graduates”

Separation Anxiety

“Pain is weakness leaving the body.” –Chesty Puller April 14, 2018 Out of breath and in complete pain, I crept steadily up the Santa Monica Stairs with my friend Kerrisha. “Come on, Janeen! You’ve got this!” she cheered 20 steps ahead of me. >>Pause. The Santa Monica Stairs is a public stairway that descends fromContinue reading “Separation Anxiety”

Get Here if you can

April 13, 2018 I’m not even a week into my discovery, yet I know so much about Sam and not much about Jeannie. The last I heard from her was through the “I may be your mother” email. So Catherine, my new cousin, had been my anchor since I found out about the truth. I’dContinue reading “Get Here if you can”

Birth story

My birth story, according to my parents, was never clear. Whenever I’d ask about it, there were many “I don’t know,” “I can’t remember,” or slight changes every time I asked about it. Once, my dad said that he was at my mom’s side during my birth, and then another time, he’d said that aContinue reading “Birth story”

Boundaries.

The next day, David called as I walked to work. “Hi Janeen, it’s David.” “Hi, David.” “Do you own a red Mustang?” “What?” “Do you own a red Mustang? I see a red Mustang on the street near your house.” “What?!” I started looking around and over my shoulder and saw the car he wasContinue reading “Boundaries.”

National Siblings Day

April 10, 2018 “Hello David” “Yes?” “This is Janeen. I called to let you know that, yes, we are half-siblings.” An ice-cold sensation came over me and I trembled as that phrase came out of my mouth. “Ha! I knew that already!” he quipped.” I knew he must really be my “brother” because this guyContinue reading “National Siblings Day”

The Call

Monday, April 9, 2018 After taking a deep breath, I called Ron and told him everything. He was just as shock as me. “How do you know it’s not a scam? Did the adoption agency ask for your social security number? “No, they didn’t. I only provided the agency with a copy of my driver’sContinue reading “The Call”

Mystery Solved

Monday, April 9, 2018 I could not tell you if I went to sleep that night. In fact, I don’t remember anything else after texting my brother Jamar. My mind was wiped like in the movie “Men in Black” when they used their Neuralyzer to flash away memories of people. I can remember, however, thatContinue reading “Mystery Solved”

Dazed and confused

Wait, what? She Thinks She’s My MOTHER, and She Doesn’t Want to Get Ahead of Herself?!? At this point, I knew I was part of some online scam. I called my brother Jamar and told him what happened. He agreed that I was part of a scam and suggested that I call our mother toContinue reading “Dazed and confused”

Whatcha’ talkin’ ’bout Willis?

Saturday, April 7. The boys and I arrived at LAX, and we were wiped out. Who would think that a relaxing island would cause this much exhaustion? A bit crusted with sand, and sunburned, we were excited to see my husband pull up. Lots of hugs and kisses went all around. Once I got inContinue reading “Whatcha’ talkin’ ’bout Willis?”

Give Me a Break

March 2018, a year and a few months have gone by since the death of my dad. He would have been 78 this month. I was hurting emotionally and desperately needed some time off. Spring break was coming up for the kids, and I thought a relaxing vacation would be the perfect getaway. Every yearContinue reading “Give Me a Break”

Just a Little Spit.

A few days after my conference, I received my DNA kit. I had gotten acute bronchitis but still had enough energy to send in my saliva sample. The instructions appeared to be straight forward: Step 1: Activate Before you spit, register your kit. Use the unique code found on both your test tube and instructionContinue reading “Just a Little Spit.”

The Loss of a Parent.

January 9, 2017, my life as I knew it ended on a cold evening in Fredericksburg, Virginia. My father was watching television in his family room when suddenly, he experienced a fatal heart attack. However, 12 minutes later, he miraculously “came back’” but was put into a medically induced coma. In February, my mother hadContinue reading “The Loss of a Parent.”